Raising an adopted child comes with numerous challenges that parents usually don’t face. Parenting an adopted child usually comes with the fear of not being a parent good enough for them. Besides, adoptive parents tend to be overly protective of their children, which leads to developmental issues, in the long run. Behaviour concerns may be present in these children, as they might not recognize their parent’s authority after a certain age. Below are some expert pieces of advice on how to cope with the challenges of raising an adopted child.
The “You’re Not My Real Mom” Challenge
Hearing such words form your child can be a shattering experience, whether you’re an adoptive parent or not. But in the case of adoptive parents, this might be interpreted as a lack of attachment to their child. Do they truly love you? Parents in this position usually interpret such words as a reaction to a potential inability of theirs to properly educate the child and offer them everything they need.
Good news is, they don’t really mean it. Sure, it’s unsettling to hear your child say such words, but these are nothing more than that: words. All children throw similar fits when don’t receive what they want, whether it’s a new CD of their brand, the latest iPhone or their favourite toy, so don’t worry about it.
You should handle outbursts like that like all parents do. Assess if they are right or not and see if you are being fair. Think about how severe the punishment is, and if they truly deserved it. If you feel like your decision was the right one, hold your ground and ignore their tears. For more information on the topic, click here.
Some adopted parents are enthusiastic about adopting the child. Sometimes, so excited that they forget that discipline is mandatory, in all families. In most of the cases, these parents tend to be overprotective of their children and treat them like they have the last word to say in all matters. If you let the child rule the household, you’re in bog trouble there. Solving this issue is not as difficult as it may seem. Simply approach this matter as biological parents do. Keep your ground, remain decent and loving, yet try to have a firm position.
The Food Challenge
Children that are adopted after their infancies will get into more food troubles than their other counterparts. This comes from a place of fear and lack of food. Hoarding and hiding food is a common behaviour in children that were adopted at an older age. Living in orphanages and shared households, comes with the disadvantage that food was oftentimes stolen from them, by the older ones. Try to explain to your child that in your household, food is plentiful and free for everybody when they want some. Reinforce this idea as frequently as possible.
These are some of the most common challenges faced by adoptive parents when raising their children. All of these can be easily solved with the right approach.